rough blunt unfinished

2008-08-03T05:41:00.006+13:00

All a-round

bun
inter
linked

sheatsmetal.
hotboyz
sonotcool
mings(h)en(g)

dickheadz

2008-08-03T03:11:00.003+13:00

A person dies, but so many thousand and millions of hearts are broken.
Friends and loved ones who read my blog, please, i am not being emo, i swear.
Because we are all borned to die, when i tried to imagine my parents gone. I felt a sudden rush of panic and fear. because i know when it happens, every morning when i wake up to say, "ma, what's for breakfast?", there'll no longer be anyone there to tell me "i'll make for you milo and eggs ok?" and for me to reject. No one to be there to force shuff fruits in my face and tell me, " really last one!" and for me us to laugh. When i'm late for school and wake up looking for her to yell at her for not waking me up, the house will be empty and i have to face the reality that she's no longer around. And i will no longer be able to feel her warmth or see her tear when i share with her my joy and pain. I am not self indulging, i'm just preparing myself for the worst because i am so attached to them, i'm afraid i really might not be able to survive without them around. But mom said, that is why we have each other, jie. Even when you say that you won't feel anything because you haven't taken time to build a bond with us, it's gonna be different. And i know your heart is not made of stone and you love us all, just open up your heart. Don't say i'm sucha girl because you know i am not. You just refuse to listen to what i say. We love you not because we are obliged to, but because we really do, i sometimes i really just hope you love us the same way too.

For my close ones, this is why, i always tell you not to get mad at your moms and dads and to love them with all your might. I'm not saying you're not, just, a reminder why i'm always to naggy. (x

never be lonely

2008-08-02T16:38:00.002+13:00

i have the answers. it because we all need a release valve. it is because people who have been through hardship understand the true meaning of pain and being miserable and to them, a broken toenail, relationship(bgr), not being able to have what they want, is nothing to them. Because they count their blessings more than i do. The time will come when he will fix me.

2008-08-01T11:04:00.002+13:00

why do we/i complain? about the smallest things. Like a broken toe nail, a bad day at school, not having the hottest pair of denims or a personal transport vehicle. Why do we/i not think of the people out there who are suffering so much more, who have bigger problems. Why do we make a breakup sound as if it's the end of the world, or its the only thing we survive on(fyi dee, i'm not referring to you, just in GENERAL). Why are we/ am i not satisfied with what we/i have? But instead constantly rave about what we/i do not have. I'm not referring to anyone in particular. Just've been thinking, once again. It's not because i think too much, which is what some people will say. What is wrong with thinking? Why do most of us choose to ruin our life before realising where we went wrong, instead of heeding advice right from the very start? The most common, answer would be, it's human nature. Don't put the blame on human nature, if there's a minority that can do it, why can't you?(assuming that you're mentally and physically sound)

And friends who read this, no, i'm not being suicidal or trying to pin point anyone and send you on a guilt trip, it's just one of the times when i observe, listen,watch people and my mind generates questions which are never meant to be answered. I just ask them, to look at them because they look so wise when they're written down in black and white or maybe it may just look plain bitchy to some people. But however they see it, it doesn't matter because we all have our different perspectives, which makes life so interesting and me, so contradictory. hahaha.

I wonder if my entries have positive effects on people. I'd count myself successful if it did.

i'm mrs "?"

2008-07-29T03:00:00.002+13:00

at this age, we, no, i, even i, want all that glam when i oogle at hot babez with ecstacy eyes and pouty lips, just to know what it's like to be them for a moment. And hopefully, if i blend in, i'll catch the attention of the guy wearing a green t shirt and carrying his guitar. Even if it meant just small talk about whatever that was in for the hippies. But then again, why go through all that and then regret trying so hard to be someone i'm not.
There i times i'd say how much i hate my sister and would just savour the moments when i imagine life without her. Then i realise, there would be nothing to savour, if she wasn't around, if she weren't a bitch, if she never brought us so much heartache, if she never existed.

2008-07-21T03:14:00.001+13:00

all for tonight.

2008-07-20T03:54:00.003+13:00

for as long as we live

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DULCIE HONEY.

Cheers to our Friendship & another year. <3

2008-07-11T06:08:00.002+13:00

would you like to see the big picture?

I need to feel a sense or urgency. I used to worry because i worried too much. Now i'm worried cause i'm not worried. Confused? It's okay, i confuse myself all the time.
But i'm really thankful to have Chunhui, my root of motivation. [:

Just can't wait for:

the exams to be over
so that i can meet up with:
Babez (shop like crazy even though i'm supposed to be saving for my education, which haven't exactly been fruitful.)
dul, deez, meowz and hopefully sianz
the day when i see curly greentee guitar boy and not be shy to say,
hi.

I wonder when i will ever be able to chew, swallow, digest, and not feel any pain.

i think not.

2008-07-09T16:10:00.000+13:00

Everythings supposed to have a happy ending
But the record keeps skipping and the needle keeps bending
Like the road Im driving to the bridge that has no end
I wanna take back everything that Ive broken
But the bridges behind me are burning and smokin

2008-07-07T04:10:00.003+13:00

O LORD, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure.
Have mercy upon me O Lord; for i am weak; O Lord, heal me, for my bones are vexed.
My Soul is also sore vexed: but thou, O Lord, how long?
Return, O Lord, deliver my soul: O save me for thy mercies' sake.
For in death there is no rememberance of thee: in the grave who shall give thee thanks?
I am weary with my groaning; all the night make i my bed to swim; i water the couch with my tears
Mine eyes is consumbed because of grief; it waxeth old because of all mine enemies.
Depart from me, all ye workers of iniquity; for the Lord hath heard the voice of my weeping.
The Lord hath heard my supplication, the Lord will receive my prayer.
Let all mine enemies be ashamed and sore vexed: let them return and be ashamed suddenly.

Psalms 6

my mom is sucha retard
i love

2008-07-06T03:58:00.008+13:00

take a leap of faith

School has been tough, for me, mostly mentally because of the competitive environment of the whole ACC batch. It was a tough fight with myself, my mind. The Lord and my mom was there however, to hear me out and help me sort things out with myself, credit goes to them for the revivial of my blog. hahaha.

Today was a very beneficial(?) day for me, especially the Singapore Stock Challenge arranged for BA students by NgeeAnn. For all those who wants to be a broker, DO NOT MISS IT, if the chance ever comes by.

I just realised i can't think with the radio on, the radio IS on but i don't wanna switch it off. So i'll just end my entry here.

Babe, miss you, love you, let's meet up once we're both through, with our schools!(x

HOLLA(Z) dee, meet you in sep, final exams are coming up and so are the deadlines for my projects. STRIVE ON!:]

Meowley shweetaye, learn to enjoy accounts, there's actually fun in it, really.

Ms oh she's too fat, now she's too thin;

2008-06-26T14:30:00.003+13:00

I want you to know that;

I will look back on this life and say that i'm proud i lived this way.
I will be the best that i can be, every single day.

;Babe, i miss you, i miss you so!

HOLLA DEEz,

let's make up for lost time. (x

2008-06-26T14:30:00.002+13:00

^.-
:[E]
blue+pink=purple
I think this is cool cause AYE took it. :D

Quoted from Dee;

"they don't know how to appreciate the beauty" in italian slang.

hahaha. Yesterday with dee was splendid. (:

Met her at 2.30++ to mug at BK till 6. Had actually wanted to have dinner at WheeLock's Fish&Co but t'was going through renovation.

Walked past Sakae and saw MONICA & MINHO, meeting them really put me on cloud nine. ahhh, love you guyzzz. :]

So we walked to Plaza Sing's Sakae for dinner instead cause both of us pigz craved japonase food.

Finished around 7ish then took a walk to clarke quay and bung/ked around for a while before heading home. Great day, grooovaye company. :]

don't not notice me

2008-06-25T04:34:00.004+13:00

My HIGH SELF ESTEEM group. :D

Today was productive.

that smile that lights up your eyes

and makes me feel all is worth

2008-06-22T17:13:00.002+13:00

because you are what matters;

Spent the day with babe yesterday. We just met up to talk and spend time together.
I was glad there was no awkwardness b/w us; after me getting all emotionally unstable because of some assumptions i made (which i am trying my best to control now), because if not then the whole thing would just be weird.
Her presence just made me calm, like everything was so tranquil. She puts me at peace, like there's nothing to worry about or anything in the world for me to rush for, no competing or comparisons and all that mattered at that point of time was just the company.
Poor babe was looking so hard for tuition cuz her school and previous tuition teachers weren't exactly helping.
Took a train with her to Lil' India thereafter for her guitar lesson and had some laughs on indian songs and remix(es).
I had to head home asap cause there was crab waiting for me and my bleeding was getting painful. But, it didn't stop me from being happy! [:
Babe, hope we can meet up soon alright? Just gotta wait; till we save enough money, for SEM break to come and when everything is pretty much settled. Love & Miss you TRUCKLOADS * INFINITY!
I can't live without you, i swear.

/edit

I managed to inspire someone to work hard today and man, it feels GRRR-8! :D

2008-06-22T02:51:00.003+13:00

Hey, are you lonely?
Has summer gone so slowly?
We found the ground,
but that damage was done.

So what if you catch me,
where would we land?
In somebody's life
forsaking his hands.
Sing to me hope

as she's thrown on the sand.
All of your works
are rated again.

But it's all wrong, you're so strong.
But this life's work
and choice took far too long.

When I was sure you'd follow through,
My world was turned to blue.

When you'd hide
your songs would die,
so I'd hide yours with mine.

And all my words were bound to fall.
I know you won't fail.

see, I can tell.

2008-06-19T06:05:00.005+13:00

why do we/i complain? about the smallest things. Like a broken toe nail or a bad day at school. Why do we/i not think of the people out there who are suffering so much more, who have bigger problems. Why are we/ am i not satified with what we/i have? But instead constantly raving about what we/i do not have. I'm not referring to anyone in particular. Just've been thinking, once again. It's not because i think too much, which is what some people will say. What is wrong with thinking? Why do most of us choose to ruin our life before realising where we went wrong, instead of heeding advice right from the very start? The most common, answer would be, it's human nature. Don't put the blame on human nature, if there's a minority that can do it, why can't you?(assuming that you're mentally and physically sound)

And friends who read this, no, i'm not being suicidal, just one of the times when i observe, listen,watch and my generate questions which are never meant to be answered. I just ask them, to look at them because they look so wise when they're written down in black and white.

2008-06-19T06:05:00.004+13:00

2008-06-19T06:05:00.003+13:00

another ditch in the road;

I just read howsun's blog i feel so happy yet sad. Happy that he's happy. Sad because i realise how much i miss mr er, he was even in my dream last night. lol. I guess he floats around somewhere in my subconciousness. Sigh. I really feel so terrible not attending their performance, i was so looking forward to it till my mom said, "we're going to hongkong, book flight already" I mean yeah, i wanted o travel but not really at the expense of the performance! Sighhhh. I miss the times in band when everything we did, we did together, and Mr Er always being so charming and great. He's the 2nd man i look up most to! 1st man's my dad ofcourse. Now i'm too ashamed to go back to see him, feel like sucha' letdown. I'm not trying to gain any sympathy by writing this down. It's just really how i feel towards him because he has done so much for me, for the whole band.
He really must have a strong heart though, because it always happens that when the relationship b/w his students and him starts, it's when it somehow ends. Sigh. Mr Er, even though i know you don't read my blog i think you should know you're the best teacher i've ever had! :]

2008-06-19T06:05:00.002+13:00

Dick, happy birthday. You rock my 'world'. Fish&Co. was awesome shiat. loveyoushomuchiiesworhsz.

Chicken rice & tiramisu cake

Today was a tiring yet fruitful day. Went for a swim at sweeties' club while she and her mom worked out in the gym. I love the bathroom, don't ask me why, i just do.

We had lunch and sweets mom left then we headed to the arcade where mel fought the hulk (the only monster i remember). Man, is she AGGRESSIVE. It's really funny how sweets came up with the philosophy that by hitting on the buttons harder the stronger the hit would be.

Then we watched some potential bimbo(s), an ego boy, a pro old man and a group of immature gays bowl. (eh mel, we damn terrible lah, anyhow label people :/ ) The whole thing was just so funny. Shall leave you guys to think of whatever you wanna think of that satisfies your emotional needs/fantasies.
Drank some coconut juice and fell asleep on some couch outside a karaoke lounge. Thank you for covering me up sweetie.

see how bad your shoulder is.

Ok my eye-lids are on the verge on collapsing so if i end with some weird language or funny spelling errors don't show me your eyebrows.

Met sarah and mom for a jog, only did about 4k, was too tired after the swim. Watched tv while waiting for her and then, finally, after two solid hours, HOME.

OHOHOH! And while i was queing up for fruit juice, some crazy man in his late 30's or 40's said, "um, sorry ah, i have never had such a beautiful woman in front of me" and shaked his hand like he had a spasm or something. I almost peed in my underwear lah. Think the guy's either autistic or just plain sick. EEYERRRRUGGHHGG. Ok, goodnight.

i can't promise you it's alright

2008-06-18T04:47:00.004+13:00

Pucker up Princess

Managed to take sophie down to the vet today instead of wasting the whole day at home waiting for her to pass motion which is yes, really quite ridiculous. Sweetie came over in the morning, had lunch and pretty much lazed around. Mom called and we had to rush down to sweetz place to get the cage to put sophie in because Singapore's cabbies do not allow uncaged dogs into their taxi's. Like so TSK lah. But we did more than that when we got there, ended up bathing dusty, washing the cage and perspiring. hahahha.

Brought baby to the vet, turned out she was just having a tummy upset because apparently, some ignorant woman in the house fed her junk. Wish i could cage her instead of baby.

Headed to vivo after that to have dinner after feeding baby her medicine.

Took a train to kallang after dinner and walked all the way to shweetay's club which she kept complaining was so very far. (TOLD YOU LAH, IT'S THE MUCUS) hoh hoh hoh. Took an hour to drink some sour drink before dragging ourselves back home.

Thank you so much for today sweetie, for being eva so helpful and thoughtful despite me throwing you around. I ought to change but don't know how. tsk. I think i need to see a doctor to. But not tonight.

this is the only time you should keep your mouth open.

Babe, i can't wait to see you. <3

2008-06-16T20:24:00.003+13:00

these small hours;

I need to lose weight and go for eye surgery. Dang, why is this devil back.

I'm sorry i'm not good enough a listener. I'm sorry i don't say things to please you or make you feel or warm and fuzzy inside. I'm sorry i don't hold as much humour as they do. I'm sorry i'm not that nice a person to spend time with. I'm sorry that i ave terrible moodswings and em always making you so confused. I'm sorry i'm not good enough for you to be proud of. I'm sorry i keep changing and can never make up my mind about who i am. I'm sorry i'm always choking on my emotions and cannot find the right words but just end up yelling in your face and stomping off, spoiling your entire day. I'm sorry i'm even in your life. I'm sorry for being so negative now because i don't know how else to express my emotions but want it to make it sound like it's your fault even though it's not. It's just me once again, being oversensitive, and letting my emotions run wild just because i'm unhappy. Way too many times, you have to get used to it.

I really am truly sorry.

2008-06-15T06:16:00.000+13:00

i am not that significant

not enough to make you truly happy

Hello all, i am back. hooray? haha

Wait, first thing first,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE<3
It was on the 13th but i didn't have a computer to post it up, so nah, here you go.[:

Honkong was interesting and the shopping was crazy. Worst thing was that things were anything but cheap but mom still bought them all. Because dad said the fashion's worth it which is kinda true. The fashion in Honkong is like 1-2yrs earlier than sg's? But anyway for the first time in my life, i actually begin to feel the pinch even though it wasn't my money. We not only shopped for clothes but for snacks! Best thing is that we managed to shop not only for ourselves but for everyone else.

I think i've gained like 3kiloz, which really sucks the most cause now i have to go on my starving diet again. Which is fyi, not very easy if you are tempted by almost every food you see. tsk. But the it was worth it, the food was awesome. All that disumz. ^^

Managed to get a few stuffs for my love(s) and dick's birthday present. Can't wait for her to open it!Not forgetting my baby, sophie. (x Oh! The shop where we bought stuff for sophie had 3 beautiful dogs and a suprely superly cute toy dog poodle (real dog lah). The Golden retriever was just so beautiful, her fur was so shiny and long and when i stroked her she just looked at me with her teary eyes. So pretty! Omygah, imagine me getting married to a dog. :/ hahaha. And the other two were those wolf like dogs, till today i still don't know what breed they're called but they're eyes and fur were WOOOO! T'was like whitefang out of the book.

All in all the trip was pretty awesome. Thank God we had a safe flight. [:

because you mean so much to me
i'm afraid i'll forget you

2008-06-11T14:35:00.000+13:00

COMM CAMP was really enjoyable. :]
Off to Hongkong, back on the 15th.
miss me ok?

to freeze a broken heart

2008-06-09T06:16:00.003+13:00

Ok i've got comm camp tomorrow. Don't know why but i don't really feel like going. Maybe it's because i just realised have yet to complete my INFA tutorial and all i can think about is the trip to HongKong and meeting babez when i get back. I've got two ppt presentations to prepare, 1 skit and an INFA tutorial to complete. All to be done in the week when i get back. SHOOT MARNZ. But,

babezy babezy babezy, i pinky promise we'll meet up kaes.

Oh yeah, babe's back from Malaysia and she's down with a sore throat and flu. Poor sweetie. I wanna announce to the whole world how sweet she was. Even though she was sick and dying she actually texted me on the second day she came back wanting to meet me. (x so sweet right. Yes people, be jealous. hoh hoh hoh. Just kidding. Just wanna let YOU(babe) see that i do remember and recognize every sweet thing you say or do for me ok. loveyouloveyouloveyouloads.
GET WELL SOON OK. and i know your birthday is coming soon, but i'll be in Hongkong.
PROMIZ i'll get you something from Hongkong ok! Ok, this blog is like a announcement board for you because i kinda busted my sms and all i have to type to you is way too long, so since you read my blog. I can put it here. (x

Same for all the girlfwenz i usually do shoutouts to! :]

HOLLER TO DEE:
i know you read my blog frequently too. So, when will you be free from the 16th to 22nd? :] Text moi before the 11th or after 15th ok? Because one sms to me will cost you $2.50. :/

To rawrie:
I don't think i'll have time to meet up with you on the last week. How bout we meet up for lunch or something when the school term starts ok? :] And besides, at least we've got once chance to meet up during the hols and many chances while mugging. So.., ok? :]

I've had it with you
and your emotional constipations

2008-06-07T03:29:00.002+13:00

The chalet was great. Food was sufficient and they all tasted soooo gooood. [x We had night cycling after that, which was the BEST part. Our route was

Pasiris to Changi
Changi to East Coast
East Coast to Bedok
Bedok to Simei
Simei to Tampines
Tampines back to Pasiris

We cycled for approximately 6hrs. I couldn't feel my butt after that.

Met up with Lynn today to collect our testimonials and cca records. She's still as cute as ever. Had a great time catching up with her. [: Spent the rest of the day sleeping, and i think i'll be going back to bed after this.

2008-06-05T02:17:00.000+13:00

Xinhui, ChunHui

Daccord, Sundown Marathon was seriously awesome even though i pretty much screwed up my internal clock. Many of the 84km runners abandoned the run once they reached the 42km mark. It was just too much, but i guess it was still an achievement. A huge one in fact. 42km is no walk in the park aye.

Oh, but the most exciting part was when the Kenya's ran past us, they were running the 42km and they had completed 10km in approx 30min! When the first 3 dashed past us, they did it in a split second, literally(!) split second, if we blinked, they'd be out of sight. And when she grabbed the water from the table she swiped the other four cups off the table from the same row because of the speed she was going at. Which was "@#$%@@#$#$ FAST"!

The scariest part was when a whole herd of people, maybe round 3000 came running at us, shoving cups into our faces like we were running taps of 100plus. Some were so thirsty that they dipped their hands into the huge tub of 100plus, (note: the 100plus weren't in cans, they were mixed in tubs) it was the ULTIMATE GROSS. So we quickly closed it and used another tub. By the time the whole herd was gone the whole place looked like it had just gone through a tornado of some sort.

But HELLYEAH! THE WHOLE THING WAS JUST AWESOME+INFINITY AWESOME!

There were some really nice runners too though that would actually say thank you, or thank you so much after we painstakingly poured like 3000 over cups of 100plus for them. Haha. Alright, it wasn't all that bad. In fact, that was the most thrilling part. (x ChunHui was so adorable doing all the funny moves and singing like some cheena banana when i played the FACE DOWN song. hahaha. Just thinking about it cranks me up. (x I didn't get to take many photos though, we were too busy walking around and brewing & tasting 100plus. hahha. ok i think that's enough information on the Marathon for those who are interested in reading. :]

MONDAY
Spent the entire next day sleeping. Met mel after muh Macro test. Caught What Happens In Vegas. The show was hilarious, Cameron Diaz may be old but her acting skills haven't aged one bit. The best part(s) of the day was dinner (OMGAH MEL, I DIDN'T SAY IT, BUT DINNER was SUMPTIOUS. OHSHOOT!FORGOT TO TELL AUNTIE!) and photo taking session. hahaha. Btw, miss you from Sg! :]

RAWRR!

advert for bulimia

TAKE IT! (sounds familiar?)

one reason enough for me to be thankful for what i have.

wassup ya'llz

TUESDAY
Caught Narnia on with Sarah. To all the critics out there, you people have no sense of imagination. It was a great movie, there was some humor injected and it worked well. T'was kinda sad though, the two older kids won't be unable to return to Narnia. SIGH. But overall, it was still really enchanting. Oh and the battle parts were so very exciting! They stuck to the same repetua and made no mistake in doing that cause it still sounded just as good together with the scenes.

Walked to moms office and went for the jog. They changed the route and it was so much shorter! Which was the reason for my grumpiness (if there's even sucha word), cause i wasn't able to feel that i had pushed myself till i could push no more. I know what you people are thinking, i'm sick. whatever. (x

TODAY

Breakfast at 10
slept till 12
lunch
slept till 6
jogged
painted nails

tomorrow's my French test but also my class chalet! SO EXCITING! (x We're going night cycling. ohsoawesome marnz. Then Dragonboating on friday! WOHOOZ. Finally i'll be breaking out of my sleep - eat cycle.

I'll be flying off to Honkong on the 11th people. MISS ME TILL THE 15th! :]

And last but not least, Babe, i miss you so much. I know we're all caught up with our own programmes but i really hope we'll be able to catch up this holiday. There's so much to say to you. I know we agreed on writing letters but i just wanna see you, talking to a person instead of a paper makes a huge difference ya' know. So, if you think i've forgotten you, i haven't ok! Still think of you everyday, and i will for the rest of my life! Hope you're thinking of me too aye. (you better be [x ) I think you'll most prolly read this once you're back from m'sia. So text me once you get back kae.

Much Love as always. :]

my toes are sexy purple

2008-06-03T01:41:00.000+13:00

SUNDOWN AS SO VERY TIRING but FREAKIN' AWESOME!

2008-05-31T00:23:00.007+13:00

Just For Laughs

Buddy Hoagies suck so much, no one should ever come. So that i can have it all to muhself. [x

And I HATE MEL'z APPLE!!!!!!!!!! tsk.

i miss camel boy[z].

2008-05-29T05:57:00.004+13:00

moon, we need facelift.

Running in the morning rocks and Macro is actually quite enjoyable. :]

Ah, where's that guy, with the curly hair, papaya face and awfully bad bit. I miss from head to toe. tsk.

Exam in 2 days! And so is the SUNDOWN MARATHON. HOOHAEYWAYWHEE!(x

To that moon faced ball:

EH HELLO. You won't fail ok. Help me out here. Your momz wants me to rub off my positiveness on you. So, HELP ME. [x

It's 1am, momz home, she's gonna bite my ass if i don't get off now. So Au Revoir Cherie(s)! :]

2008-05-25T07:27:00.009+13:00

Today was very productive! :] Manage to finish revision for INFA. So i can spend the rest of my time mugging for Macro! :]

woke up at 6am, reached zanne's school at 7
mugged till 9
went for a run, showered
mugged till 3
had dinner at 4+
mugged till 6.30
reached home at 7.45
went for a walk with sophie

it's too tedious to blog out details. Point form is so much easier. (x Ok, to everyone out there who are taking exams, JIAYOU and STUDY HARD! :]

2008-05-25T07:27:00.008+13:00

and so it is.

Everyone ranks they're level of importance for people/things differently, as for me, they are the first on the list.

Wanna spend as much time as i can with you. I don't want to regret it when you're gone.

because it will be pointless.

nothing's gonna change my love for you

2008-05-25T07:27:00.006+13:00

can you take it?

Because i'm human, i feel
and i do not like what i'm feeling
then you go labelling and ranking away
till it breaks someone's heart
but no, it's never your fault
and you never have a motive

so it's all on our parts to read you correctly
then again you say we've read you wrongly
you never had such an intention

sometimes we all think
it's best not to know you at all
to save the trouble of going through the entire process
or maybe it's just me with the problem
always with the problem.
never gonna make it any better

so seal this emotion and thought of mine
before it morphs any further
till it's uncontrollable and indistructable
before it's too late

and no, don't bother to try to read this
because you never see anything
because you have chosen to be blind
you did not have a choice
no one has a choice
what a nonsensical excuse i feel
but she's wrong for all the right reasons
always.

and i have so much more, to give.

2008-05-25T07:27:00.002+13:00

this is the hardest story that i've ever told;

OK. So it's 2.28am and i'm awake. Reason being, i was a pig and fell asleep at 8pm and woke up at 12am SHARP. Man, my body clock sure is accurate, got to give it some credit for that. hahaha.

So i'll be mugging till 6.30am then go for a jog and off to church! :] Hope i'll be able to stick to the plan, that is if i don't fall asleep halfway. Staying up really reminds me of the good o'l D&T days & nights. hahaha

OK INFA. HERE I COME.

I seriously can't wait for Vampire Knight Epi 8! MONDAY MONDAY!

feel as if i'm wasting

2008-05-22T04:26:00.001+13:00

She said, I was seven and you were nine
I looked at you like the stars that shined
In the sky, the pretty lights
And our daddies used to joke about the two of us
Growing up and falling in love

Take me back when our world was one block wide
I dared you to kiss me and ran when you tried
Just two kids, you and I

Well, I was sixteen when suddenly
I wasn't that little girl you used to see
But your eyes still shined like pretty lights

Take me back to the creek beds we turned up
Two A.M. riding in your truck and all I need is you next to me
Take me back to the time we had our very first fight
The slamming of doors instead of kissing goodnight
You stayed outside till the morning light

A few years had gone and come around
We were sitting at our favorite spot in town
And you looked at me, got down on one knee

Take me back to the time when we walked down the aisle
Our whole town came and our mamas cried
You said I do and I did too

Take me home where we met so many years before
We'll rock our babies on that very front porch
After all this time, you and I

I'll be eighty-seven; you'll be eighty-nine
I'll still look at you like the stars that shine in the sky

2008-05-22T02:40:00.001+13:00

everything feels so wrong
when you're not here

Now's the time to say, OHMYGAH, I AM STRESSED.

2008-05-20T02:52:00.003+13:00

yeah, i like time

Spent the whole day working on the LMS presentation, thank you so much everyone for putting in so much effort! :] We completed everything in one day! HUGE ACCOMPLISHMENT! :] It was hilarious, should've took photos to show anyone who's interested, the entire process. I do have some photos but Melvin's gonna kill me if i post em, but i guess one won't kill. So, heh, (x

We actually did up our props and presentation in KFC, got chased out when the manager came though. We were really actually quite anal, painting a M'cdoland's sign in KFC. hahaha. I'd be totally offended if I were the manager. (x Got cut off halfway because our our lousy batteries and had no choice but to head over to my place to rehearse our skit, which really wasn't that bad an idea. With aircon bagua, apples and oranges provided by my ever so lovang muthar. loveyoumomz.

Caught DrillBit Taylor later in the evening, it sure tickled everyone. Mindboggling! (sry just felt like using that word, whatever it means) Brilliant movie. Displays the trauma most American kids have to go through if they get labeled as losers on their first day of high school and the ever so touching and heartwarming things friends would do just to save you. awww.

Zanne's entire left side of her body has been aching for almost a month and i seriously am worried. Pray hard she'll keep to her word and see a doctor tomorrow.

Alright, gotta complete my LMS ppt. Au Revior Cherie(s)!

So here's your picture. Kinda' sweet eh. Stop, before your mind wonders to the term couple, they're Mother & Child. (x hoh hoh hoh.

to be of a little more significance

2008-05-18T01:14:00.003+13:00

SEE!FRENCH PLAIT!MY HEAD! DOOBALL YAY! :D

sianjibua.

Work in pohgress.

YOOAYE! Mission accomplished! (x

So sarah and i headed down to Ngee Ann's library to study at 9.30am (when everyone was still in bed snorning away). We had to leave an hour and a half earlier because my school's at the other side of singapore. :/ So anyway, the 4hrs of mugging was fruitful. Managed to complete my DSS & INFA assignments. Met mom & dad at 4 for lunch at Sushitei (wheee).

GreenTea rawks marnz.

Went for a jog, the stitch came back but at the speed i was going, it wasn't that bad. Everyone says it's a muscle spasm, so it has to be it. Well hope the spasm stop spasm(ing) because it sure is a burden. So tomorrow's free for family day! YIPEE! I won't have to worry about any assignments whatsoever.

Oh! & MAN AM I EXCITED FOR THE SUNDOWN MARATHON! I'm in charge of the drinks and first-aid! And i'll be patrolling around Changi on a bike with a walkietalkie. so kewl luhz.

I'm looking forward to church tomorrow and after that because we'll be getting Sarah a new pair of running shoes. YAY! hahaha. She's lost like 1/3 of her weight, which is, PEOPLE, a GREAT ACHIEVEMENT! hoh hoh hoh.

OHH!I ALMOST FORGOT. ALL YOU (girly) SHOPAHOLICS OUT THERE, go to http://freepeople.com/ MYGAHH. the stuffs are *SQUEALLLL*!

Meowzerz, don't forget to take short breaks okay! STRIVE ON! Don't give up, you're getting there! :]

I'm going to write babe's letter now. We've yet to catch up. Babe, if you're reading this, i want you to know i miss you incredibly much. Hope you're doing fine with B ok. xoxo.

2008-05-15T11:54:00.000+13:00

SEE MY FRENCH PLAIT :]

what i can do for now
things i can still hold on to
people i can still tell i love
friends i can afford to spend time with
a life i am still to pursue
before time runs out.

time is slowly taken;

2008-05-15T03:49:00.002+13:00

youaresimplylove.
haha.instant dress.
IWANT.
IWANT

The medicine that the doctor gave me has some weird effect on my mind and muscles, i can't walk steadily and keep forgetting things. Like every event that's been going on the past 3 days are just all jumbled and flying around looking for it's folder. sheesh. So anyway, i went for dinner with Kimas today, my ever so lovable 'phillipino'. She speaks indonesian, chinese, hokkien & teochew! Does she rock or what! I really admire her for her positive outlook on life. She's never troubled about her future or studies, always one thing at a time. Being with her just makes me forget about what i've always been rushing for.

So i wore this really long skirt and a tube top to school with another pull over which was so irritatingly loose, i decided to lose it and 'connect' my skirt and tube. hahaha. I bought a long skirt and 2 tops a pair of pants,some dress and (FINALLY) NEW EARPHONES! :D HAH! [:

Alright back to BM's tutorial.

you wake up

and now the end is gone

2008-05-12T15:43:00.005+13:00

Had i known how to save a life

BEST INFA TEACHOR eva.
Indonesian Phillipino
failed attempt
<3 href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_p2L6Sx2zpAw/SCmxAxJCbhI/AAAAAAAABOA/yRwOyJtMeMc/s1600-h/DSC00223.JPG">hullo pretty
mwah!

don't their smiles just make you melt? They made mine.

grant him one last choice

2008-05-12T15:43:00.004+13:00

do i mean less now?

or does __ mean more?

Lunch at Sushitei was so awesome yohz but the it was the company that meant so much more, for once, everyone was present, including the forever MIA Suzanne Seah. Oh, and i have to make a Universal Statement,

GREEN TEA ice cream is the best ice cream ever!

Dinner was pretty good, not for the fact that i had a killer stomach ache. Weird thing was there was no gas or (youknowwhat), it was just pure excruciating pain. And people people, prepare yourself, because sharon seah might have cancer (nah, i'm just exaggerating). I've been having these really bad spasms, stiches on the right side of my stomach, it's more towards the bra line and feels like it's beneath the ribcage. It hurts every morning, even if i'm walking at a speed of 1km/hr. I'm going for a check up today, so, cross your fingers and pray hard that i turn out alright if i'm of any significance in your life. (attempt to send everyone on guilt trips) hahaha. Just kidding. (x

and when i saw them together

hurt & jealousy shot through my veins

2008-05-10T21:42:00.000+13:00

If I don't say this now I will surely break
As I'm leaving the one I want to take

YOOHOOOZ! I got in for the final round of interview for ambassadors!

Thank you jesus, for granting me faith and confidence in myself to be able to genuinely express myself. Thank you for even making it possible. :]

BA COMM orientation was FOO-AHHN! hoh hoh hoh. We did an act on the escape of Ma Selamat and a song adapted from Janet Jackson's - Feedback. Group 5 is in the lead with 74 points! However, the accumulation of points doesn't stop here, there's more to earn during COMM camp on the 9th of June. Better still, the camp ends on the 11th and my ambassador camp (if i get through the last round) commences on the 12! shnibblemefizzlebobz, so exciting!

Events sound exciting and the anticipation is overwhelming but, i spent the entire afternoon eating, sleeping and jogging. I've been having really bad stiches that are increasing my timing! GRRR, which is fyi, BAD. I've got to find out what's causing them. Most probably my over consumption of water. Alright, so that's all for today. Mom's out at some function, attempting to be the next 'david copperfield' hahaha.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MOMZY and MAMA. :]

Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait
My heart has started to separate

2008-05-10T05:42:00.002+13:00

I spent 4hrs thinking of my studying venue and have yet to find one. My gahhh, i won't be able to sleep till i find one. if i don't, i'll end up spending my entire day eating,sleeping/watching tv at home. tsk.

I know, you people who are reading must be listing out the many conducive places now. Well, factors to take into account;

-my younger sister is'nt street smart enough to be able to travel all around S'pore
-my BA COMM orientation ends at 1pm

my sore eyeballz are popping out of their sockets.

2008-05-06T05:44:00.002+13:00

pucker up princess;

OHMYGAHHHH.

SO MUCH/MANY

homework
interviews
events
clothes to buy
friends to catch up with.

GAHHHHH.

mommy's homemade dessert so nice. eggy.

i'll wipe that whipped cream off your lips
with mine.

2008-05-05T04:22:00.003+13:00

What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged;
take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share.
Jesus knows our every weakness;
take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden,
cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge;
take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
In his arms he'll take and shield thee;
thou wilt find a solace there.

2008-05-03T05:20:00.000+13:00

we don't talk because you don't listen anymore.

2008-04-29T14:53:00.008+13:00

The past few weeks have been so busy, there is not one day when i do not have any assignments to complete, once one is done, another one 'shockingly' appears. It's been fun however, learning new stuff, getting my brain working again, no longer having to worry about wasting an entire day of my life. Haha, those days were seriously hilarious, i would just sit on the couch and think of every single problem i had and the end solution would always be something bad. Nothing ever happens though because they all vapourise when i fall asleep watching tv. hahaha. Okay, enough nonsense.

I enjoy INFA, because i understand. I like BM, Macro, LMS & French because they're engaging. The only module i do not like to a certain extent (hawhaw) is DSS. I know i can't say i'm not a programme(s)/software(s) person because i know i'll b able to pick it up as long as i put in enough effort, but i just do not have an interest in it. Worst thing of all is that i'll have one PBL which involves either Access or Excel every SEM! (no, i will not curse) :]

So, wo3 hui4 muo1 ta1(PBL) de4 di3. hahaha.

Babe, meowzerz, Dee, Dul & Sian, i apologise for not being able to spend time with you guys. It's not that i don't want to but i really do not have the time. It's like i have no social life, my daily routine's just

-school

-cca(if there is)

-home

-jog(if i have the time)

-sleep

if there's no cca, time will have to be made for project work. If you guys are reading, i'm sure (sorry raw assumption) you guys have a hectic schedule too, esp when exams are only 2months++ away. So grr-layz, don't give up! meowz & sian , keep up the good work! I know it looks very lame here, but i mean it. Dee & Dul, i know things are getting tough but try not to get distracted or too bothered by minor things alright, BE OBJECTIVE! :] I know i am in no position to boss you around or tell you what to do but i just don't want you hunayes to regret anything, i know i may be wrong about that. But, just wanna let you guys know i care.

ESP DUL WHOM I HAVEN'T TALKED TO IN LIKE FOREVAAAZZ.

Babe, all will be in the mail, for now, love you[:

Oh, and if anyone is wondering about bf, i think it's over because we haven't texted in like 4 days. o.O what should i do? Maybe i should start befriending my mom.

STUDY & FAMILY DAY TOMORROW. dooball YAYz.

2008-04-29T14:53:00.006+13:00

lacking in objectivity;

Why be so affected about a remark you know is obviously not true? Maybe it's because you want everyone to think the same way you do. I'm just making a raw assumption, it may not be true. Yes D, i am referring to you if you are reading. You know how pretty you are and why let this guy whom you know is an expert in passing asshole remarks, affect you. Then you'd be letting unintelligent and unimportant remarks affect you. You know you're beautiful, i know you're beautiful, your close friends know you are too, so why let this ONE insignificant guy change all that? We will all reach a point in our lives when we start to receive critics much worse than just, "you're ugly & fat", so what are you going to do then? Text everyone close to you or anyone close to you and ask them to boost your ego?
If you continue to let such remarks by insignificant people affect you, you might end up like michael jackson. Just because one fan called him a pimple face, he changed his whole complexion and facial features, look at him now, do you think it was worth it? :]
It doesn't work that way. Ok? I hope you understand what i'm saying and not get pist with me for blogging it down. If you do, i am sorry for being so frank and blunt.

2008-04-29T14:53:00.002+13:00

I am satisfied. I am happy.

This is selfish.

after an entire week of brainstorming on our DSS PBL project we finally completed TASK 1! It wasn't even as difficult as we thought it was (what's new?). hahaha. Hectic weeks, months and years ahead. GAMBATE everyone! :D

2008-04-26T05:51:00.004+13:00

I wish i could find a friend that would be able to hear the things i don't say.
But wishes don't come true.

2008-04-26T05:51:00.003+13:00

Oh dear, i just realised i had gone back on my word about no emo entries.
So anyway, here's some really nice and relaxing music for all you blog hoppers out there. :]

i recommend the pieces
-can you feel the love tonight
-wonderful tonight
-think of me
-memories
-Love will keep us alive
-My heart will go on

actually all are really nice. :]

2008-04-26T05:51:00.002+13:00

i will be waiting for you to come back home;

i want you to know

i really need you

these sleepless nights have awaken

and only you can put them back to sleep

i can't rid this selfishness i have for your time

i just need you by my side

jealousy surges through my veins

when my mind pictures your happiness with the other one

who is now i perceive, is your only one

please prove me wrong

i know i am

but i reuse to admit it

now let me say i'm sorry

for i have not uttered a word to you

but only grumble softly in my house of negative emotions

that no one will ever hear.

2008-04-23T03:40:00.007+13:00

so i said too much;

With every appearance by you, blinding my eyes,
I can hardly remember the last time I felt like I do.
You're an angel disguised.
And you're lying real still,
but your heart beat is fast just like mine.
And the movie's long over,
that's three that have passed, one more's fine.
Say my name. I just want to hear you.
So I know it's true.
So just say,
just say that you'll stay awake for me.
I don't wanna miss anything.
I will share the air I breathe,
I'll give you my heart on a string,
I just don't wanna miss anything

2008-04-23T03:40:00.006+13:00

i don't know what to say
or how to say what i want to say
all i know is that i dare not say anything
because on nights like this, i say the most foolish things.

i miss you

2008-04-23T03:40:00.004+13:00

I spent 4hrs completing my DSS hw and 5minutes doing this.

2008-04-19T03:58:00.003+13:00

make a difference to your precious life today;

Don't look down on me cause i am young
i'm full of life and the journey's just begun
I dont have it all figured out
but i don't wanna lead my life following the crowd

All i hold are these dreams, these hopes
Please don't take them away from me.
Instead, please help me believe.

I know there are no limits to the things i can achieve
I know that i am special
full of life for all to see
these hopes i have are the things i cannot do w/o
so please don't put the fire out

Please don't doubt my words
all i need is just a lil' love
will you help me chase these dreams?
will you carry me so that i can touch the sky?

These are the things that matter
these are the treasures of my heart
Everything i strive to be
what the world can't take from me
wanna look back on this life and say that i'm proud i lived this way.
Was the best that i could be every single day.

and someone else's.

And for all my friends, i just want you guys to know that in my previous post i wasn't pinpointing or saying that you guys aren't/weren't there for me ok! Read b/w the lines ok. love you all.

2008-04-16T04:11:00.004+13:00

it was really that coldness expressed through your eyes

Tonight really made me realise why people always complain that friends aren't there in their most time of need. Everyone gets their own life sooner or later and i think it's time i got mine.
I just hope that tonight, i haven't lost anyone.
and thank you rawrie.

that hurt the most

Humour:
It's TOO LATE to APOLOGISE~
IT'S TOO LATE!!!~~~~

2008-04-16T04:11:00.002+13:00

My NEWclassmate just moved into the condo i stay in and lives directly opposite me.

I want so much more of myself
so much more.

2008-04-10T00:46:00.005+13:00

Family days, i don't know how to describe them but they mean the most. Maybe because i don't get to spend much time with them.

But anyway, school resumes tomorrow, and i'm kinda excited for French class. Learning a new language is a big thing to me, especially when it's a language that i actually have passion for.

Everyone who reads my blog and who's school(poly) starts tomorrow, keep your spirits up for the following three years okay, not just tomorrow. Maintain your stamina, ok people! :D And for those preparing for your O's. Commitment, determination and there is no failure, only feedback. So if the prelim results kick you hard in the butt, take it as a wake up call to get you to work harder alright!

CVMB'07 i miss you guys like how Romeo misses Juliet when they are only metres apart.

stop trying.

2008-04-10T00:46:00.004+13:00

Maybe there's a God above

And all I ever learned from love

Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you

It's not a cry you can hear at night

It's not somebody who's seen the light

But it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

2008-04-08T00:28:00.000+13:00

Changeling;

Another head hangs lowly,
Child is slowly taken.
And the violence caused such silence,
Who are we mistaken?
Another mother's breaking
Heart is taking over.
When the violence causes silence,
We must be mistaken.

when we kick the bucket.

2008-04-07T02:05:00.002+13:00

I'll hold you till it's over

mylove.

oh!oh!i know this one. Bliss :]
(x
pretty lil' baby
sigh (:

So this was Friday and like always, it was absolutely enjoyable and heart warming.

I would like to think what we have is the one in the millions.

let my arms be your shelter
your hiding place forever

2008-04-05T06:12:00.003+13:00

This was how i spent my monday. SG flyer's beautiful. Something worth doing with the company of loved ones or just a 30minute relaxation period for yourself. :]

Tuesday was a bore except the 8pm jog and tutioning Sarah at a BBQ pit in Sunglade.

Wednesday's DPA BBQ was brilliant. Calvin is sucha' talent, so is the very pretty and adorable Serene. The night at baby's place was horrid, but the company was priceless.
Thank you Jingying for the long talk(s).

Thursday was baby's day. Mom owned the evening and night. Dined at Sushitei, that is all that i can remember.

Today i got bloated(literally) at the Sakae Buffet with Salterina Pang. She made me realised how much i missed the dreadful yet enjoyable nights spent in the D&T workshop, the reason for my happiness in receiving letters and how much i missed her. Sian, if you still read my blog. Remember, Passion, The Right Attitude & Commitment. :]

I noticed some thing(s). Which i shall keep to myself till i meet babe tomorrow. It is really quite hurting if anyone who cares would like to know. In fact we all know it, but we just don't accept it because we all leave out things/people, we know we do, but we're just too ignorant to aknowledge or be bothered about it. I am fully aware that i am no judge. But this is not a statement made to judge people, but a fact.

Oh, and

Happy Birthday Rawrie. You're a year older, so start acting like it. haha. Dry Humour.

you'll see, soon enough

2008-03-31T00:28:00.010+13:00

HEE-lair-yours

classic

this was how i spent my tuesday.

Glam Shot[z] of sophie-a baby

Time today was spent meaningfully, i guess i made the right choice in cancelling the outing with my colleagues. Learnt 3 new dishes from my mom today, so next time when someone asks me whether or not i can cook, i can confidently reply, "YES!" hahaha. 'Why does it even matter?' ,some might ask. Well, it might not matter to some of you, but to me, i feel all ladies should know how to cook. :] (My perception) Went for a jog, managed 5k (HOLLER AWESOME!) [x and dinner was sumptious.

life's just great,
happiness is a state of mind.

2008-03-26T14:50:00.001+13:00

Yesterday was just pure awesommeeee(:

changed my mom's watch
did up rawrie's card
read 19 minutes
went for 5k jog

ohohohoh. :]

2008-03-25T04:03:00.002+13:00

you can keep ranking;

Alright, so i spent my day pretty meaningfully today.

Mailed in my application form for my chosen elective language module.
bought rawrie's birthday present.
Bought my tights (FINALLY)
" FOS t-shirts (after realising the extremely small number of shirts i have in my closet)
" my mom a watch (DOUBLE YAY)

Bad news is, the watch's strap has some problem with it's buckle and i'll have to go back again tomorrow to change it. But it's alright, i have all the time in the world. Alright, gotta head to bed now, people people, to prevent cancer, sleep by 11.30pm! Because that's when your body starts repairing itself. So, NIGHT! :]

every one holds a place in my heart.

2008-03-21T06:03:00.007+13:00

all great leaders.

ALL4ONE. sigh, ilove&missyouguyssomuch!

The Absorbent Mind's Camp is the best camp i've ever attended. I believe everyone in the team had gained and benefited much from it. Not only did we learn about leadership and how to be a great leader, we also built relationships and bonds no one can ever take away. Thank you all so much for opening up and having a positive attitude throughout the camp.

I recommend everyone to join this camp if you ever have the opportunity, you will not regret only if you go there with an open mind and positive attitude. Because leadership is not about position but about passion and having the right attitude. :]

you guys have really made a huge impact in my life.
DPA has come to an end, and we've made history.

CLASS NPP of 2008!

BEFORE LEADERSHIP CAMP

ALL HAIL THE AHLIANS!

hahaha. Guesswhat.

Step up two was good but not all that. I still prefer Step Up. Most probably because Step up 2's dance was basically all streets, with the pumping and hopping and poppin', i couldn't really see or feel the feelings in the dance. However, the last performance did succeed in increasing my pulse rate, ecstatic! hahaha. I'm biased towards contemp, which explains my prefrence, so people who think Step Up 2 is nice, knock yourself out with the hoppers marnz. :]

2008-03-16T16:18:00.002+13:00

I am unable to control my unsettingly voracious appetite which explodes in atomic proportions when it comes to you. And it has made me lose my senses which has floundered off petulantly to have a love affair with someone else. I'm bare.

I seriously do not know where i'm heading, i'm not feigning confusion. My passion for music & dancing is overwhelms everytime i hear a beat or my sole hits the dance floor or a big open space. Now, will someone tell me how that, anything at all, is related to the debits and credits i'll be doing for the rest of my life?

2008-03-14T16:39:00.002+13:00

DPA was exhausting-ly awesome.

2008-03-03T16:30:00.002+13:00

2008-02-27T05:44:00.002+13:00

so shy yet sincere;

I saw this gay couple on my way home just now, and for a moment, my heart actually ached, for them.

I cannot promise that i won't break your heart.

2008-02-16T06:03:00.002+13:00

i don't give no shit baby;

I thought i'd be able to get back the same feeling if i stood in front of the real thing. But no, i felt lost and confused. I couldn't move forward. Things don't work that way. I don't want it to be like that. But nothing is how we want it to be. It never is. So i shall not steal from my future any longer.

2008-02-15T01:18:00.002+13:00

not good enough;

What is it with guys and their high sex drives?

i'll wait

2008-02-13T03:16:00.001+13:00

hahaha, the irony;

Today was awesome except for the marathon i had to run in the morning. Bloody shuttle bus's timing is screwed. But anyway, class ended at 1 and my ITB group and i headed down to Funan Centre and Simlim Square to check out the information needed for our project. I didn't think i'd be doing such stuff four years ago and i still can't imagine i'm doing it now. Weird, but it acually felt good. :]

Met up with MinHo and Chin Chian soon after and man, did we eat our hearts out or what! I barfed after the first round but managed to keep the 2nd round in, MinHo cleared his bowels and Chin Chian was going slow & steady. hahaha.

HOHOHO.

Tong2 Zi3

GAG.

Chin Chian & I waited for MinHo's bus then walked from PlazaSing to Raffles City and Raffles City to Clark Quay. Thank you walking partner who prays to tong2 zi3 and looks like him (HAHA) , we shall walk again, sometime soon. :] It really is amazing

give it up

2008-02-09T05:49:00.000+13:00

ily.

Weird, but i miss dulcie.

KungFu Dunk was hilarious, nearly touched my heart but missed. People who are lookin' for emotional fufilment, humour and animation, watch KUNGFU DUNK. The captian is, one word, MAN.

just got for it baby

2008-02-08T03:15:00.000+13:00

uh?outline

i got eggstremely long hair

wth
zanne, enough.

green
hahaha
suicidal
soemo

military
zanne is so expensive. CalvinClein & LEVI

:(=)
ilike. thanksdicksy.

gonggong
mama
:D

yourstruly.

it's a pimple ok NOT A MOLE.

camwhore for me.
:[E]

3asses.
and a peabrain

zanne, give it up, i've got bigger eyes.
olala.
tsk.

so ke3 ai4 worxzxzx.

ME! :D
pretty right(right).

momzy,mama,zanne

HAPPY CNY ALL.
After all these years, zanne is finally starting to look like a woman. I'm happy. & for goodness sake., i do not have a bloody mole, it's a PIMPLE.

baby,
it's gotta be our way

2008-02-06T05:02:00.000+13:00

WE'LL MAKE THIS LAST FOREVER

bignoseissues
<3
see,pimple.
hahaha.
mwah.
badbit

Just, babe, we'll be friends for the next 9 to 10 years or maybe even 50(if we can even live for that long)! But whatever happens, I'll ALWAYS LOVE YOU and you will always be a HUGE, SIGNIFICANT and IMPORTANT part of my memory ok! LOVE YOU SO MUCH. mwah.

and so i put them all down

walk away and take your hand

i trust you to help me trust again.

2008-01-31T05:19:00.002+13:00

ok, we both agreed this was weird.
:
:Dthank you darlin'
:Dthank you ME.

She wore a white bikini, i wore a black bikini. I wore a white tank and she wore a black tank. Later she changed and we both ended with a white top and green bottoms. NOT INTENTIONAL. PURE COINCIDENCE. Thank you so much darling(ya' know what i'm talking about.) OUTING again soon ok. And you are already hawt, so stop trying to hide your fats because there's nothing to hide. yay.

stuck between the exit and bottomless pit;

2008-01-31T05:19:00.001+13:00

howmanyisboobsayeholdin'

3 people entered the fitting room, each holding 4 dresses.
<3
yay[:

Yes, i am very happy. thank you.

School's just lame and tiring. Mindworks is just a module that screws our mind. But S&W's fun. I learnt howda chacha today and my teacher's mediumhawt. Was supposed to chill with babycakes today, but ended up walking, still, it was enjoyable. Time spent with loved ones is 99.9% enjoyable. Please eat and rest well alright Meowz. loveyouall.

I'm not going to sleep tonight, till i lose that kg.

yours to keep;

2008-01-19T14:26:00.004+13:00

no one likes to remember the good things. i wonder why.
i just hope they understand instead of making me feel as if i've committed a crime.
Just keep blaming me, yes i'm an asshole, a bitch.
I'm sorry that i finally got out of something and am enjoying life.

Because my joy bring you pain.sickshit.

2008-01-19T14:26:00.003+13:00

Dulcie, Chewsian, Dora & Mel, i'm sorry i can't understand or feel how dissapointed all of you are, but it's not the end ok.

Especially my baby salty, you are eligible for DESIGN, APPEAL ok. :]

Dulcie darling, i don't know what to say but think through before choosing ok? Don't brood over your language (even though i know i would too). But there's also no use holding on to nothing. Whatever it is, I support whatever decision you make.:]

And seriously speaking, i'm damn happy for Melinda Tan Mei Shan (even though i didn't say it to her because she might think i was being sacarstic), who didn't fail ANY subject and still have a range of courses for her to choose from. So, DON'T FOOL AROUND AH.

Dora sweetie, if you really don't wanna go to wherever you're eligible to go then don't. Poly is not that bad ok? I support your phsycology course! :D

LYNN & YANJING, CONGRATULATIONS! MOOHAHAHAHA. :D

And if anyone would like to know,
I AM OVERFLOWING WITH JOY. :]
Because i scored 12 points for my L1R5! And am eligible for St. Andrews JC. Yes, that pretty uniform! But then again, no, i can't go because "I" have already made up my mind to go to ngee ann and take up accounting. School starts next week, so unfair LOR. But i enjoyed myself today with the computer boy, old man and cutsie.

Babe, i'm not angry with you. I have no reason to be. And i really miss you alot. There's so much i wanna talk to you about but can only tell you face to face. Sorry, but phones weren't invented for people like me. (x Don't need to save to buy me anything, i just wanna see YOU & only YOU ok. No need any presents! love.

LAST OF ALL, I APOLOGISE TO MEL & DULCIE for not replying their messages.
My reason why for;
DULCIE,
"you always text me during work, how am i to reply? And sometimes at the end of the day i don't reply because i just read through your message and tell myself that i'll reply you la'er but when i reach home, i'd already be dead beat and forgotten that i've yet to reply your message ok? Not because i don't want to."
MELINDA
"i always read your message once i get home and it's always too late and also sometimes because i just read through your message and reply others first then tell myself that i'll reply you la'er but when i reach home, i'd already be dead beat and forgotten that i've yet to reply your message ok? Not because i don't want to. Also sometimes i don't find the need to reply and em seriously damn tired. I know i'm being an asshole but this is why ok." You can stay angry at me, i deserve it. But i hope you calm down soon because it's not helping anything ok.

no reason to.

2008-01-19T14:26:00.002+13:00

just because;

The Jay concert was really quite awesome even though i didn't get high like how my 35 year old colleague did. Just the thought itself cracks me up. There was this 'pleasantly plump' lady behind us, obviously a huge jay fan, screaming throughout the whole concert, i think she lost a kg or two just doing that. And if any of you listen to jay songs, there's this particular song where he goes, "ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-hahaha!" in a martial art typa tone. The lady behind me was doing it and she sounded like a bloody dog yelping, i laughed throughout the whole song because all i could hear was her, barking. But all in all the night was awesome, all thanks to 'jay edison'. [:

it's just so sweet.

fat lady behind.

2008-01-19T14:26:00.001+13:00

to people who've been wondering what i've been up to, thank you.

bunny got horns.
love your braces.
HAHAHA.

wth.

and yes, we're back together. :]

no more emo posts. no need for emo posts. i've given up on trying to get everyone who reads my blog to sympathize with me. Because, to ME, that's just pathetic.

Anyway, these are all the photos i have for now. I'll post again if i have any photos, if not, you're gonna hafta miss mwa.

2008-01-03T06:07:00.000+13:00

i won't wake up tomorrow.

2007-12-30T04:56:00.001+13:00

SCRAP BOOK (hon&i)

we spent 5 solid hours ok.

love you honey.

honey so sexy ah. (x

XD

where's sarah :/

one of the better ones. but mommy's face. ):

wet kiss. so smewlee.

yes yes.
baby.

So did everyone enjoy their New Year's Eve? I did. With momsy, boobsy, honey and mel. Spent the whole morning and afternoon with honey. Helped her do her hair and watched her put make-up. So pretty lo.

Then met mom for dinner at AHHOI. The esplanade was so congested i nearly fainted from lacy of oxygen and my mom's complains. Really lame ones. Mom was HEEElarious. Seriously, she was so giggly, she spread it to me. I shall upload the video and you people can hear hear from the background. Everything you hear is said by her. Alright maybe not everything but 90% of it (including the screaming). (x

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE.

no, not tonight.

2007-12-30T04:56:00.000+13:00

Summer time, the nights are so long
The leaves fall down, and so do I into
The arms of a friend
Winter nights
My bedside is cold,
for I am gone
And spring blossoms you to me.

his name is ah-ON.

2007-12-25T06:21:00.005+13:00

don't lie to me
because it's gonna break that wall of trust
no matter how much i love(d) you
or how much you mean to me
i'll let you go
all you have to do is to lie to me
and the chains around my heart will break
leaving you free to escape
and if you don't leave
i'll throw you out.

2007-12-25T06:21:00.004+13:00

CARBO OVERLOAD.

I decided to skip work today and have the buffet at Heeren's SAKAE with boobsy, dicksy and baby. Trust me, WE ATE. gag. Well today was enjoyable, it made up for all the lonely hours spent at that screwed up workplace. Jowe's left, it was his last day today. Lucky rich bastard. Miss me or i'll kick your ballz. [:

THANK YOU DICKSY. love.

when will this ever end?

2007-12-25T06:21:00.003+13:00

Better late than never. i love you babe, so much. :]

2007-12-25T06:21:00.002+13:00

i'm meeting babe tomorrow.
finally. :]

2007-12-25T06:21:00.001+13:00

merry christmas everyone.

2007-12-24T05:40:00.003+13:00

i just need someone to care.
anyone.
i just need someone to listen.
i just need someone to understand.

& i'm just too full of myself.

2007-12-21T15:26:00.001+13:00

soft sand

:0\

PANTS OF PEACE

why don't want):

er

look carefully, AEROPLANE.

;D

poke cloud

alright. photos are in random order. Went to east coast with sarah today because it was my off day. Was supposed to go back for the Open House but couldn't because of my dyed hair. Sorry fish families, really am. Love & miss you girly wirlies so much. Then headed to town with dicksy to get christmas presents. (thank you for the worlet.) My gawd, i'm dying of this freaggin stomach ache. I think i've got worms in muh intestine. \:

Baby look so cute in dress. (x

2007-12-21T15:26:00.000+13:00

stop & stare;

I'm very happy because i can finally do something for dicksy.
I'm very happy because i can finally meet bella honey.
I'm very happy because i've got my hair dyed.
I'm very happy because i can't wait to meet up with hunaye bunnaye.
Ok. So i am fortunate.

to start counting

2007-12-19T03:32:00.000+13:00

26th Anniversary

The last performance was the best. Not the music. But the company. I love Mr Er, seriously and i'll always look up to him. I miss him so much already. FISHFAMILY, already locked away safely in my heart. love you all so much ok.

don't bother.

2007-12-14T07:05:00.004+13:00

it's just a lie

you don't know.
you don't have to know.
and you never will
because it won't make any difference.

maybe the hurt game is fun
to you.

2007-12-13T05:02:00.002+13:00

these secrets are walls that keep us alone;

It's really so human for someone to say how much they want to make things better then later complain about how much that hate being at home. Then when disaster strikes and one of your loved ones attempted to commit suicide, the whole cycle starts again. When will i ever learn to understand. Prehaps i never will.

yeah, how about it.

2007-12-12T05:45:00.001+13:00

1+1=2
yellow so handsome. (x

ahh boobsy so cute. love you sugarbooger. moowah.

2007-12-10T05:18:00.000+13:00

just wait till it stings;

There are thes two guys at work and i think i'm crushin' em.
There's this guy i just got to know and i think i'm crushin' him.
Boy, am i desperate or whot.